My oldest daughter's boyfriend got his ear pierced (left is right and right is wrong! Don't you remember that saying back in the day?) the other day and it started a chain reaction. Brianna was going to get her upper ear pierced, then chickened out because it would have to be done at the tattoo place and not with a piercing gun. She decided on a third hole in her right ear.
Of course, the youngest daughter wanted her ears done, too. We explained how it would be done and she was all gung-ho. Cut to Claire's. (the earring place where they pierce ears) Brianna goes first for her one hole. ($26? Girl, PLEASE! Hand me the gun and I'll do it for free!)
BUT FIRST... (that's me channeling Julie Chen on Big Brother) the paperwork. OK, see, I got my ears pierced back when I was like...9, or something, which would be like 18 years ago. Er, I mean, 28 years ago. (sob) Back then, you walked in to the 'Earring Tree' at the Muncie Mall, slapped the money down and the girl would shoot each earlobe one at a time. Using only an alcohol pad to sterilize your ear and NO GLOVES! (we also walked there. Uphill. In 3 feet of snow.)
NOW? There are forms to fill out. In triplicate! There are rules to read. Disclaimers to sign. "If your ear falls off, it is NOT our fault." This is pretty much what I heard, "Sign here. Print here. Initial here. Sign here. And oh, did I forget to ask for your driver's license to prove you are of age and also your medical records complete with the physician's dictation stating that he sliced your lower abdomen and pulled this child from your womb?" So, only after getting a notary to witness and stamp my signature (and initials) did they finally get to piercing!
Look, I'm all for cleanliness and proper OSHA crap, but I didn't have to sign that much stuff to get married! Or to get my driver's license! Or heck, even to get my tubes tied!
So finally, after much ado (which, what the heck IS ado, exactly?) the girl took the gun to Brianna's ear and shot it. The end. And I forgot to pull my camera out because, hello? I'm a forgetful dork even though I ALWAYS have my camera at the ready for ALL of life's major events.
Anyway, Braelyn was next. She's a tad shy and we finally get her into the chair. I turn to the gun girl for one millisecond and turn back to Braelyn. She's crying silently. Long story shortened, she decided that she just wasn't ready. Yay me! No more filling out of the FORMS! Instead, she bought a HSM necklace that says, "Fabulous" and has a little dangling charm of Sharpay.
Which Bubba promptly found lodged in the washer yesterday.