Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Panty Martyr
I've come to the conclusion that I am a panty martyr. Yes, you heard me right.

Let me explain. You see..as the Matriarch of the family, I am in charge of making sure the little booties of my children are covered in nice, clean, hole-free undies.(Because you never know when you might be in an accident and have to have your clothes cut from your body and then I would die from embarrassement if the nurses and doctors saw old, dirty, holey undies!) And I do..for the most part. Granted, there are mornings when I am running through the house looking for a clean pair of "big boy underwear" for Baby Jor a pair of panties for Tater that actually fit her now and not 2 sizes ago. (though there MAY have been a morning or two where you MIGHT have heard these words in our house.."just pull them up the best you can...we'll find better ones for tomorrow." But NOT from me...oh no)
Then there is Guard Girl who prefers these kinds of panties...


So, anyway..back to the martyrdom. In the quest to keep my kids in nice clean panties...Mama does without. No, no..I don't mean I go commando or anything. I mean I can't remember the last time I bought new panties for myself. Seriously. So what does that mean? It means that about once a week, maybe twice, I throw panties away. Why? Holes. Elastic that is hanging in little strings from the band. Elastic so stretched out that I spend the day at work running to the bathroom every five minutes or so to pull up my panties which have now bunched up somewhere about mid-thigh.

I think I am down to..oh..approximately 5 pair of panties, not counting the 2 pair of maternity panties I have left over from my last pregnancy which are for back-up usage only. (read:when laundry is behind.) What's that? Huh? My youngest is almost 3 you say? Shut it.

But by golly my son's cutie little patootie looks adorable in his brand spanking new Spiderman underwear.

My point?? I sacrifice MY comfort...MY bootie for the sake of the children.

Panty Martyr. That's me.

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posted by Angie @ 9:11 PM  
17 Comments:
  • At 1:22 AM, Blogger xtessa said…

    LMAO!!! just the other night, i was showing my hubby the sad state of my undies... poor us!!!

     
  • At 8:26 AM, Blogger Shelley said…

    This is fabulous! All all mothers like this? Seriously! I need a new bra as well - like that'll happen anytime soon! And then when I get a new bra, likely the episode of Oprah will come on and I will determine the bra is not the right size for me. Then I'm back to old reliable crap-bra. Great post!

     
  • At 9:18 AM, Blogger Nickle Annie said…

    Holla from the other Panty Martyr!

    When I started reading your post, I thought to myself, I really need to get some new panties! LOL! Love, the AC/DC ones by the way!

     
  • At 10:36 AM, Blogger Crystie said…

    This is so funny, because I was just praying to get my W-2's today, so I could file my taxes, so I could get the refund, so I can finally buy new underwear!!! (and a new sofa!)

     
  • At 11:41 AM, Blogger Vic said…

    Oh dear. Honey, while we must put our kids first, you must also take care of yourself. I refuse to be without the finest in underwear. They keep me pretty. Now march yourself over to Victoriassecret.com. They are inthe midst of a sale as we speak. You deserve it!

     
  • At 1:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    lmfao ... anyhow, kids underwear is cuter ... ours is boring ... now if they'd make some powerpuff girls underwear or teen titans underwear for US, that'd be different!!!

    ;)

    (yes, i'm kidding ... kind of ... i wouldn't be caught dead in powerpuff girl underwear ... and they prolly already make those)

     
  • At 2:45 PM, Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said…

    A panty confession! A great laugh!

     
  • At 4:15 PM, Blogger guppyman said…

    OK... I'm upset....

    We get pics of children's underwear.... but where are the pics of yours????

     
  • At 9:19 PM, Blogger Unique Designs from Zazzle said…

    awww, guppyman stole my line. heh

     
  • At 1:32 AM, Blogger davis5 said…

    Puhleese, my newest panties I got on sale 5 years ago for $.75. Honest to Jesus. With 3 kids I've got thru 4 bra cup sizes...I wore my strapless bra from MY PROM last year to a formal event (husband in military)and had to stuff it with 2 pairs of socks.

    Thank God the littlest (a boy) is still in diapers or else I would be doomed to Little Mermaid and Tinkerbell panties. Gonna start storing up for potty training now.

     
  • At 9:16 PM, Blogger sea said…

    (((Angie))) The martyrdom of motherhood -- is there any sacrifice too great? Get yourself over to VS, young lady!!!!!

     
  • At 7:00 AM, Blogger Beanhead said…

    1st I know how you feel. I just in the past month bought myself some new cute panties.(my baby is 4) Gotta say those little boy shorts ones are pretty comfy.


    2nd I double dog dare you to go buy yourself some new panties. You will feel like a new woman...;)

     
  • At 10:55 AM, Blogger "Jet" said…

    Isn't it amazing what we give up as parents for our children??? They should thank us DAMNIT!

    XXOO,
    JTL

    Now get rid of the granny panties and go for the thong!

     
  • At 7:17 AM, Blogger Carol said…

    Funny! I'm writing a post about this post at The Median Sib. Just too funny!

     
  • At 9:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Angie, you are a riot! I laughed aloud. I won't add my sad tale (pun intended)to that of these other poor moms' panty comments.

     
  • At 8:18 PM, Blogger Jane said…

    Would you like us to host a telethon?? Or maybe we could all send you one pair and you would have more than enough!!
    I feel your pain...been there, done that!

     
  • At 2:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Alex finally gets the idea that pooping in his pants is so last year and his bottom looks SO CUTE in underwear!

     
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